I treated my friends to the Sichuan pepper chicken I successfully developed last week (it seriously looks terrible!), and I met Haozi, whom I hadn’t seen since graduation.
Looking back at work, it’s been a chaotic mess, wasting time every day. But even compared to a week ago, I can see a little progress.
This reminds me of what Master Wang Yangming said when instructing his disciple:
Someone asked: “When I am still, I feel quite good, but as soon as I encounter affairs, I become different. Why?” The Master replied: “You only know how to cultivate stillness but lack the effort of self-restraint. In such a case, when facing affairs, you will topple over. A person must polish himself in practical affairs, only then can he stand firm and achieve stillness in both calm and action.”
I also tasted a new flavor 😋
The second picture shows a flower blooming near my home. I looked it up and it’s called “Xiao La” (Ligustrum sinense).
During the May Day holiday, I returned to Xi’an but didn’t have a chance to go to Xiaonanmen, nor did I get to eat my favorite Xinjiang-style pepper chicken.
So after coming back, I angrily learned a bunch of recipes and bought six big chicken legs! Added spices, boiled, shredded, and poured the prepared pepper sauce over it. Wow, it actually turned out pretty good, maybe only slightly inferior to the Xinjiang-style pepper chicken.
It’s now part of Chef Wang’s luxury menu, waiting to invite friends over to eat😋
Picture 1 is Chef Wang’s pepper chicken with side dish of pan-fried asparagus and mushrooms (friends are welcome to come eat) Pictures 2 and 3 are that Xinjiang-style pepper chicken (located at Xiaonanmen, welcome friends visiting Xi’an to go eat)
P.S. I got so excited while posting this post that my hand shook and spilled Coke on the side dish😭 but it wasn’t bad?
This journey is clearly the long road of a young person’s growth: in early childhood, we see parents and elders as omnipotent; in adolescence, we think we are the chosen ones; then, with failures—one after another—we gradually refine our understanding of life. This is the process of disenchantment.
It’s a neutral process, and perhaps the difference between people lies in the kind of life belief they hold: is it nihilism? Religion? Grand narratives? Dialectical materialism?
Or perhaps fate truly exists, but it isn’t predestination. Instead, we struggle to grasp the rope of fate, welcoming the storms and beauty along the way. Holding onto the rope may be exhausting, but we have a choice—and the only choice is whether to let go.
Well, as the years pass, the youth will eventually fade, but who remains is unknown.
Life is toil; death is rest.
The picture shows my favorite Xi’an meatball and pepper soup shop—no tables, just large and small stools, dining by the street. Across from it, the little dirt mound is the tomb of King Zhuangxiang of Qin (the father of Qin Shi Huang).
It just hit me that I forgot to post my 18 curated photos from the past year on Weibo. The more I went through them, the more I realized I have far too few photos with friends;
This year, I need to take three times as many photos with friends.
After not playing games for two days, I still didn’t feel like getting into it today. I remembered some old books I found after moving—two collections of English poetry: one is a Keats anthology that feels destined for me, and the other is Shakespeare’s sonnets.
After gaming, I picked up the poetry book beside me and started reading. I struggled to read it fluently, but with the translation, I could understand it. Rereading it over and over, I found more pleasure in it. So it would be a huge crime not to share this Shakespeare poem.
The poem carries so much information that I almost want to cry when I close my eyes.
Just a moment ago (it was actually last night—I posted a graduation photo with Senior Jiang, but the review didn’t pass🌚), I saw a freshman on Gcores Talks venting. I wanted to comfort them, but then I thought about it and realized there wasn’t much I could say.
That thought reminded me of some snippets from my own college life. What stands out most is leaving Xi’an in the second half of my senior year to intern in Beijing.
Entering the workplace for the first time, many of my dreams fell short, and I started feeling a constant loneliness, with occasional doubts about life. Back then, young as I was, I didn’t realize you could rent just a single room. I spent half a year in a tiny room in Shangdi. It was also in that same place that I saw cockroaches for the first time. I tried going on random-direction walks on weekends. On Valentine’s Day, I bought myself a rose, and the second half-price cone from McDonald’s I gave to the girl at the McDonald’s dessert counter—all my dear classmates were still at school, and I dreamed of going back there.
Taking advantage of the Qingming holiday, I bought a train ticket back to Xi’an well in advance. My heart swayed gently with the sleeper car. Carrying a rather heavy backpack, I entered through the southeast gate of the campus, took the stairs three steps at a time up to the Zhongying courtyard, crossed the courtyard, stepped into the dormitory building, and finally arrived at the door of 0235.
I opened the door, and it was as if a white light filled my eyes, as if the door connected the future and the past—I was back in a beautiful dream. Chen Shen was still hunched over his seat playing games, Brother Gou was sitting on Lu Di’s bed, Lu Di was nowhere to be seen, and Zhu Xi leaned out from his spot and said, “You’re back.” I almost cried.
Now, 0235 has already sent off another group of naive youngsters after we left. Campus life was full of small, sweet troubles, just like what the young Gcores Talks friend complained about. I deeply cherish my college days, and I remember how the school asked us to “shine for the world.”
Maybe my own troubles seem like small, sweet troubles to others too. That’s kind of amusing.
Outer Wilds!!! (星际拓荒) I made it through with the Blizzard Phase 4 podcast! With Longma, Zhongqing, and Simon by my side, I no longer have deep space fear! The universe holds no malice!
